Thursday, August 5, 2010

Day 32 of 90: Stress

I am completely stressed out today. It's Frog's birthday, but Hub had to work so we're doing his actual celebration tomorrow. And yesterday, our neighbor died. He lived with his mother, who is home bound and in her 80s, and he was in his 50s. He wasn't completely right in the head. (can't think of a better way to phrase that right now) My mom has looked out for them for years now, we all do. One of us always picks up their mail (all the boxes are down the hill), we often take a meal, mom does their shopping.
Well, all of this started when the son got sick a few years ago, cancer. He'd been getting worse, but really went downhill just in the last few weeks. God provided mightily in it all; his sister had come for an extended visit and is here now. So she was able to be a great help in his last few days.

Anyway, that added to the stress level, but even more was added today. Today, dad came home early from work. He wasn't feeling well. He is in congestive heart failure (2 heart attacks over the past 13 years) and has COPD. His blood pressure and his pulse kept dropping. Finally, he decided to call the nurse line at his doctor's. She said come straight in. Mom took him to the VA and they admitted him. His heart is not beating correctly. The doctor thinks he can fix it with a change in medication, but he needs to stay in the hospital while they fiddle with the meds. So that definitely kept me in a stressed mood all day today.

I'm feeling better now that I've heard from mom and know that he's feeling better.
Here's where God comes in, only, I should say, He's been here all along, I just forgot to look.
I had highlighted a section in my Bible to write on for today's reading. I'm a day ahead in the reading, but I can't seem to write my post as soon as I finish, so it's always a teensy bit faded. So, as I sat down just now to see what to write about, I found it very interesting that what I had highlighted was 2 Chronicles 15:4 but when in their trouble they turned to the LORD God of Israel, and sought Him, He was found by them.  Hmmmmm, wonder if I would have been less stressed today if I had been seeking Him as I should have been? How did I manage to leave God out of my day? In the hustle and bustle of life, I just forgot. Even while still reading my Bible. But I was reading more as an "I have to read X number of pages today" type of way and not in an "I can't wait to read God's Holy Word today and find out what He wants me to see" kind of way. And I did not pray at all today. D'uh! I don't usually forget. But I did today. And now, looking back, I can see why I was so short tempered with the boys, and why I felt like my pulse was racing several times, and why I felt so completely overwhelmed by today. I forgot to talk to my best friend. And talking to Him always puts me on the right track.

I'm sorry Lord. Please forgive me. Please help me to remember that I need You, that I don't have to do all this alone, You are there, You care, and You want to help me through this life. If I take it all to You, You carry my burdens. Father, please help me remember that. I love You. ~Amen.

No comments: